Post by tln on Apr 27, 2007 12:00:29 GMT -5
CHAPTER 5
As the young lady was tending to her garden one afternoon, she heard her name called in the softest of voices. No one in the village ever called her by her name before. It was a familiar voice. Warm, husky and absolutely masculine. A voice she dreamt every night of hearing from again, but also the voice from the man who had hurt her. Upon hearing the voice, as if struck, still bent towards the grounds, she was immobilized momentarily and stopped pulling the weed she already had in her hand. She gasped, stopped breathing, one eyebrow unconsciously lifted higher than the other in disbelief, her forehead furrowed. She smiled ever so briefly. She even whispered inaudibly his name. But as he softly called her name again, with her heart beating erratically, fast, she slowly stood up and turned around to face him. He stood only a few steps away from her. Oh, he was still so handsome, she thought to herself. He looked much thinner, his cheeks a little hollow; around his eyes, they bore little wrinkles, but the months had not aged him. She found butterflies starting to flutter inside her stomach as she looked as his handsome face.
“Sik Sik,” said Sai Man, “You are beautiful.”
Sik Sik looked away, down at the ground, not knowing why she was embarrassed to hear him say that. Sai Man took a few steps closer and started to reach for Sik Sik, but she looked up with pain apparent in her eyes, still silent, and Sai Man withdrew his hands.
“Forgive me,” said Sai Man earnestly, quietly.
Sik Sik’s eyes swelled with tears. She slid past Sai Man, the sleeves of her ensemble ever so fleetingly brushed up against his arms, and ran into the house without saying a word.
Each day Sik Sik dreamt of seeing Sai Man again. She still loved him. Missed him terribly so. But she could not get past the fact that he had so often hurt her so. This last time, she did not understand why he wanted to hurt her so coldly. But when Yat Tang Dai Si saved her after her fall and she was conscious again, he had explained to her that she had survived only through the foresight of someone who had sealed all her pressure points. Otherwise the fall and the stab wound would have been fatal. Sik Sik understood what Yat Tang Dai Si meant. Sai Man had injured her and when he struck her with his palm into her shoulders, he was the one who sealed off her pressure points. She did not have to think too far to know that it seems Sai Man did what he did, but that he did not want to kill her. It was as if Sai Man was putting up an act for someone. She was supposed to die. But Sai Man, in a way, saved her. Who could have wanted her dead? Who could have been so powerful to have Sai Man do what they want? Still, Sik Sik was hurt that Sai Man never shared with her his troubles. He did not give her a choice. Instead, he took it upon himself to decide and seal her fate. It was just once too often.
Sik Sik promised herself she would not cry, if and when, she saw Sai Man again. She promised herself. She willed it. She was almost successful, but somehow, when he uttered the first words, she could not hold back the tears. She did not want Sai Man to see her crying. She wanted to be strong. She wanted him to know that he could not have the effect on her anymore. The only way that Sai Man would not see her cry was to run away.
Sai Man chased after Sik Sik into the house. But the door to the only bedroom was shut closed. There was silence inside. “Sik Sik, open up please,” said Sai Man as he knocked on the door. “It is all over now. I would like to explain. I love you. I would like to take you home now. I want to take you to the Imperial Palace where we will be together forever. Sik Sik, please open the door.”
There was still silence inside. He could hear what he thought were little muffled cries and some clothes rustling gently, but nothing else. If only she would say something, anything to him, he thought. He would prefer her to scold him, tell him what she thought than the silent treatment. It hurt him as much as seeing her tears flow because of something he did.
“Sik Sik. I beg you to open up and listen to me,” pleaded Sai Man, this time knocking more insistently on the door.
Still nothing.
“Sik Sik, you could not understand the dilemma I was in. I was torn between my love for you and my obligation to the country and my people,” said Sai Man. He rested his hands on the door, talking with her through a closed door. He did not want to explain to Sik Sik this way, but he could not expect her to welcome him with open arms after what he had done. It was unforgivable. Nevertheless, he hoped Sik Sik would see it in her heart to forgive him.
So Sai Man explained to Sik Sik that his uncle, Tau Kwok Kau, gave the ultimatum and how Li Jing and he, with the assistance of his two closet advisors, planned to deceive Tau Kwok Kau. He explained the power Tau Kwok Kau had with his royal father, the Emperor. He explained the impending pressures from Li Wai Gut and Li King Sing. Li Jing laid out the plan that Sai Man had to convincingly stab Sik Sik with the knife, showing him where to position the knife so that it will not impale any vital internal organs, and how Sai Man was to seal the pressure points until Yat Tang Dai Si could save her before she fell to the rocks below. It was orchestrated very carefully, very painfully so, because the deception had to look real. Tau Kwok Kau’s men were everywhere and Sai Man knew that he was trailed that day. He also knew if Tau Kwok Kau did not have some physical evidence of the deed, he would not be convinced. Sai Man had difficulty explaining to Sik Sik what he eventually had to do on the cliff that day. It pained him to think about it. But he had an act to play for Tau Kwok Kau’s man or else all would be lost.
“There was never a promise that our plan would work Sik Sik. There was no guarantee that our plan would work and that Yat Tang Dai Si would be able to save you, but I had no choice. Yat Tang Dai Si was consulted and he said there were no guarantees, but that no one had perished under his care,” continued Sai Man.
“I have never been afraid before in my life. But Sik Sik, when I hurt you and saw you plummet off the cliff, I was terribly afraid. I wanted to jump and follow you. It took all my strength to hold my ground and wish Tien Ti was looking down upon us and blessing us. It took all my composure to go through those initial days before we heard news from Yat Tang Dai Si that you were in his care and all right.”
“Sik Sik, forgive me please. I am so sorry. I love you and need you.”
The door abruptly opened from the inside. Sik Sik moved away from the door to stand near the window, looking out. Sai Man was so happy and relieved Sik Sik had opened the door finally. He took a couple of small steps into the room, but stopped short of Sik Sik and waited. He looked at her and could tell her eyes were red and a little puffy, but the tears seemed to have been wiped away. His heart somehow felt a pressure he seldom felt. It hurt him to know she was crying.
It seemed an eternity before Sik Sik spoke.
“Why couldn’t you have shared with me your predicament? Why didn’t you let me make a decision for myself? I do not interfere with your royal affairs, but I hope you will consider me important to share in your life, not just through the happy times, but through the difficult times too. I am not angry with you. I could never be. But I am sad,” whispered Sik Sik in a quivering voice, trying to speak and yet hold back her tears.
Sai Man listened intently before he responded. “I know I could not ask you to forgive me for all that have happened, but I could not tell you of this decision I had to make Sik Sik. My initial decision was to take you away with me. We would leave the Capitol and live a quiet life in a remote bucolic village far away somewhere. But I could not. I could not be selfish for my own happiness and leave the country to my two brothers. The people would suffer. I could not tell you because I thought it would hurt you more than to do it this way. This way I could be the one to make the difficult decision, live with the consequence, but not put you in the same predicament. It was not much of a choice.”
“I am afraid Sai Man. Whether you meant to before, you turned me away once and next, you deceived me in hopes I would run to Kong Fung. Then this. I am frightened of the future. I do not know if I could handle it again if you decide to cast me away for some reason. I am wholly confident of your love, but I would hope to be by your side to make decisions on my life, on our life together, not to be invisible and then told to deal with what life dealt to me. It is a lonely feeling, Sai Man. Do you understand what I mean?”
Sai Man came close to Sik Sik. He was right behind her. She could feel his warmth. He brushed up against her. He could smell the natural sweet earthiness that always reminded him of her. Sai Man gently caressed her hand on the windowsill with his right forefinger. Sik Sik missed Sai Man’s arms around her. It took all her will power not to lean back into his body.
Sai Man could feel Sik Sik stiffening, but he would not back away. “Sik Sik, I made decisions in my life which I wish I did not have to make. In fact, I do not wish my worst enemy should ever have to make the decisions I had to make. I am not proud of some of the things I had to do, but I do not regret them. You are dearest to my heart, and those who want to hurt me will go after you first. But I am the Crown Prince now; there will be no one else who can separate us. I am so sorry for what I have put you through. When it comes to love, I have made a few mistakes in turning you away, but I promise I will try harder next time. We can grow together. I will be a better person for you, a good husband to you.”
“Kong Fung once told me,” continued Sai Man, “’never hurt the one you love because it will be too late to regret it someday.’ I took his advice to heart and promised him I will never leave you.”
“Sai Man . . . .”
“Sik Sik, come with me,” Sai Man whispered persuasively near Sik Sik’s ears. His lips brushed her ear lobe. Still standing behind her, he wrapped his arms around her, and because she was so petite, was able to envelop her into his arms and caress her arms with his fingers simultaneously. He could sense Sik Sik’s defense weakening. He kissed her on the crown of her head.
And Sai Man got his answer. Sik Sik relaxed in Sai Man’s arms and rested her head on his chest.
CHAPTER 6
To help Sik Sik get acclimated to the Capitol again, Sai Man brought Sik Sik to the Li Mansion first. He would choose a good day to escort Sik Sik to the Imperial Palace. He already had her quarters ready at the palace, but yet to tell the Emperor. He wanted her to be his Princess before he would become King and she his Queen.
Sai Man arranged to talk privately with Kong Fung before he re-introduced Sik Sik. This was the first time they were together after the confrontation with Li Wai Gut and Li King Sing Sing within the Capitol walls. As they drank privately in a room, they talked about the triumphs and tribulations of the past few months. Kong Fung began to unconsciously think about the loss of Wu Tien Mun, his school mates and friends. He thought of what Li Wai Gut said moments before his death and wanted to ask Li Tai Gor. Kong Fung also pictured Sik Sik in his mind. Sik Sik was so beautiful. He wished he never left their village in search of martial arts. She would still be alive. If only . . . .
Kong Fung’s thoughts broke off as he thought he heard Sai Man mention Sik Sik. He thought he heard Li Tai Gor apologize about something, than he realized that Li Tai Gor did in fact say Sik Sik was alive.
“Sik Sik?” questioned Kong Fung. He was in shock! “Sik Sik is not dead?” he continued with both a surprised and puzzled expression and tone. Kong Fung’s heart was beating fast and he was so happy to hear the news. Then he listened further as Li Tai Gor explained the deception they set-up painstakingly for Tau Kwok Kau and how he could not tell Kong Fung or anyone else. It needed to look real and what better to show that it was real unless there were people mourning after a loss. They anticipated some of the reactions and that contributed to the success of the plan. Li Tai Gor apologized again to Kong Fung for putting him through the grief.
“May I see Sik Sik? I would like to see Sik Sik for myself,” said Kong Fung. He was ecstatic with the news of Sik Sik. So relieved she was alive. He did not mention or ask any questions of Li Tai Gor about the deception . . . nevertheless, he could not help wonder about what Li Wai Gut said. What else had Li Tai Gor done? What was Li Tai Gor capable of doing to win the throne?
“Of course, Kong Fung,” replied Sai Man. “Sik Sik is resting now, but tonight, we would like to invite you to stay for dinner tonight. It will be served shortly. Lok Wan is here too.”
“Lok Wan? Did she know about Sik Sik?” questioned Kong Fung.
“No, Lok Wan, was not in on the plan. She is innocent. I wanted to tell you first and then I will tell Lok Wan later,” replied Sai Man.
Later that night, Li Jing and Madame Li prepared a quiet and quaint dinner. They were all sitting at the table when Sai Man entered the room, Sik Sik by his side. He escorted Sik Sik to the table. Kong Fung had stood up when Sik Sik entered and came to her side to inquire about her. He came to pay her his greetings, was reserved, but inside, he was so happy she was alive. He wanted to talk to her, but it was a little difficult with Li Tai Gor present. And to compound it, Lok Wan rushed to Sik Sik’s side in her relief and ecstasy, and stayed all night beside Sik Sik.
Later than evening, when dinner was over, they gathered in the sitting room to have some tea. They talked a little more. As Sik Sik bade everyone a good night because she wanted to rest, Kong Fung excused himself and asked to escort her back to her room. Neither Sai Man nor Lok Wan made a comment.
Kong Fung and Sik Sik walked in silence until Kong Fung asked whether Sik Sik was happy.
“Yes, I am very happy,” replied Sik Sik. “Happiness is what I make of it after all. If you are asking about whether I am happy with the turn of events, there is nothing I can do. I have come to understand and accept there are times when you do things you do not want to do. Even you have gone through it Kong Fung. I do not blame anyone. I am not mad at anyone. It is my fate. And it is up to me to think and make my destiny as good as can be.”
“Yes, and I have regretted it,” Kong Fung replied resignedly. He knew what she meant. Even though Sik Sik did not blame him, he always regretted that he gave up Sik Sik for martial arts. He wished he never left their village in search of martial arts. If only . . . .
“We should look forward to the future. I love Sai Man and cannot live without him. But Kong Fung, you are my best friend. I hope you think of me as one and that you will always remain my best friend.” With that comment, they had arrived at Sik Sik’s room. They bade each other a good night. Sik Sik closed the door as Kong Fung turned around and walked away.
Kong Fung walked along the corridor to one of the small gardens. He was thinking about what Sik Sik said. It seemed a lifetime since he left his village for town. Since coming to Wu Tien Mun, befriending Li Tai Gor, all the experiences since, his life changed so much. He still loved Sik Sik very much, and had come to accept that as long as she was alive and happy, he would be content with that part of his life. He saw in her eyes her affection for Li Tai Gor. Kong Fung could never win back her love and yet, could not love another as Sik Sik.
CHAPTER 7
A few days later, Li Sai Man escorted Sik Sik to the Imperial Palace. He took Sik Sik to her private quarters and was extra careful in ensuring she was comfortable. Her private quarters were not ostentatious, just comfortable and with amenities that he thought Sik Sik would be familiar with so she would not be in shock living in a new place. After all, after the wedding ceremony, she would be staying with him at his quarters. Vases of white lilies mixed with pink peonies were splayed artistically around the several rooms. He even had peony perfume oil handcrafted and delivered from Li Jing’s hometown at her disposal in the boudoir. However, what captured Sik Sik’s heart and attention most was what she found on her pillow. It was the operatic mask Sai Man used to cheer her up in one of their initial encounters. Sai Man brought the operatic mask from the Li Mansion. She pictured the scene fondly as it flashed through her mind. The mask brought them together because it was one of Sai Man’s attempts to make her happy when she was feeling so desolate. She had not seen it since she was gone last time. Sai Man knew how sentimental the mask meant for Sik Sik and he made sure it was brought to the Capitol. He wanted her happy. Sik Sik was touched with Sai Man’s thoughtfulness.
He introduced Sik Sik to Chan Poh Poh, his nanny who had taken care of him since he was a baby. He left Sik Sik with Chan Poh Poh, who he trusted with his life, otherwise he would not leave Sik Sik alone so soon. He had matters to take care of before the coronation. He went to see his royal father and broke the news of Sik Sik to him. Sai Man asked the Emperor to allow him to marry Sik Sik. The Emperor asked Sai Man about Sik Sik’s background and lineage.
Up until the past few months, the Emperor would mostly likely have dismissed Sai Man’s request without much thought. The Emperor was not a very good Emperor as he enjoyed the pleasures of his position more than the obligations. He would have been patronizing and condescending to issues that affected the royal status. Chun Sik Sik came from a humble background. How could she be a match for a royal Prince? However, with the passing of his two sons and the retirement of Tau Kwok Kau, he was ready to pass on the throne to his only remaining son. He had given thought to the fact that his inept reign may have enabled the dissention and bloodshed in the court. Sai Man was always his preferred choice as the Crown Prince . . . until that unfortunate incident in which Sai Man was connected to the death of one of his favorite concubines. Sai Man was intelligent, observant, and generous. Above all, the Emperor knew Sai Man loved his people and will take his duties seriously.
He gave his blessings to Sai Man for the royal wedding, with a date for the coronation to follow soon there after.
Sik Sik never looked lovelier in her red wedding dress and regal wedding headdress. She was absolutely stunning. Sai Man beamed as he saw Sik Sik. It was a dream come true for him. He fought so hard for their love. He was finally able to proclaim Sik Sik as his beloved to the entire country. As the Emperor blessed the wedding, the people throughout the country were celebrating to mark the happy day of their beloved Crown Prince.
The coronation took place the following weekend. Li Sai Man was proclaimed Emperor in front of the Mandarins and Ministers in the Imperial Court. They all pledged loyalty and long life to their new Emperor and Empress. The young couple looked regal and beautiful together. The two marked the beginning of a new era. Out on the streets of the Capitol, people were remarking that the new Emperor and Empress made an undeniably excellent couple together. The young Emperor was so intelligent and talented, while the young Empress was graceful, virtuous and beautiful. The people also remarked a new day has begun. They predicted a peaceful and abundant reign. Sai Man and Sik Sik epitomized a dream come true.
Later than night, when Sai Man and Sik Sik were alone in their private quarters, Sai Man told Sik Sik he had a little present for her. Sik Sik flushed pink and coyly responded, “You have given me so many presents already, what more could I possibly want or need?”
“And I will continue to lavish you with more presents, more jewelry, and more clothes! I like to give you things. I love you! If you like anything, it is yours!” proclaimed Sai Man excitedly and playfully. Sai Man was in a euphoric state, he was so happy to have Sik Sik’s love and share his future with her. “Actually, this little gift I have for you is not really a gift from me. Here it is.”
Sik Sik looked up at Sai Man and saw his rakish smile. Her heart skipped a beat just looking at him.
Sai Man had whipped out a little box that he held behind his back. It was a beautiful cloisonné box with gold trimmings. It was decorated with two beautiful butterflies. In the corner of the box were embedded sparkling precious gems. The cloisonné was made with perfection and Sik Sik knew Sai Man must have gotten it especially for her from the famous cloisonné-maker in a town near the Capitol.
“Open it up and take a look Sik Sik.”
Sik Sik unclasped the box and to her utter surprise, she saw the handkerchief she had embroidered the fateful night before her fall. The dragon and the phoenix signified her and Sai Man together forever. She had made it for Sai Man. She had not thought of that piece since.
“I have had it with me, near my heart, Sik Sik. It never left me. Now that you are home, I want you to have it back,” said Sai Man.
Sik Sik was overjoyed at hearing Sai Man say these words. He never knew she had made it for him. She did not tell him.
“I do not know what to say,” began Sik Sik. She was so touched by his sentimentality and love.
“I made this for you. I never told you because I wanted it to be a surprise for you. I was thinking of us when I made this handkerchief. It seems you kept it as it was intended. Please keep it. Sai Man, I love you so,” Sik Sik shyly professed.
Sai Man took Sik Sik into his arms and led her to the bedroom. It was a night long in the waiting.
As the young lady was tending to her garden one afternoon, she heard her name called in the softest of voices. No one in the village ever called her by her name before. It was a familiar voice. Warm, husky and absolutely masculine. A voice she dreamt every night of hearing from again, but also the voice from the man who had hurt her. Upon hearing the voice, as if struck, still bent towards the grounds, she was immobilized momentarily and stopped pulling the weed she already had in her hand. She gasped, stopped breathing, one eyebrow unconsciously lifted higher than the other in disbelief, her forehead furrowed. She smiled ever so briefly. She even whispered inaudibly his name. But as he softly called her name again, with her heart beating erratically, fast, she slowly stood up and turned around to face him. He stood only a few steps away from her. Oh, he was still so handsome, she thought to herself. He looked much thinner, his cheeks a little hollow; around his eyes, they bore little wrinkles, but the months had not aged him. She found butterflies starting to flutter inside her stomach as she looked as his handsome face.
“Sik Sik,” said Sai Man, “You are beautiful.”
Sik Sik looked away, down at the ground, not knowing why she was embarrassed to hear him say that. Sai Man took a few steps closer and started to reach for Sik Sik, but she looked up with pain apparent in her eyes, still silent, and Sai Man withdrew his hands.
“Forgive me,” said Sai Man earnestly, quietly.
Sik Sik’s eyes swelled with tears. She slid past Sai Man, the sleeves of her ensemble ever so fleetingly brushed up against his arms, and ran into the house without saying a word.
Each day Sik Sik dreamt of seeing Sai Man again. She still loved him. Missed him terribly so. But she could not get past the fact that he had so often hurt her so. This last time, she did not understand why he wanted to hurt her so coldly. But when Yat Tang Dai Si saved her after her fall and she was conscious again, he had explained to her that she had survived only through the foresight of someone who had sealed all her pressure points. Otherwise the fall and the stab wound would have been fatal. Sik Sik understood what Yat Tang Dai Si meant. Sai Man had injured her and when he struck her with his palm into her shoulders, he was the one who sealed off her pressure points. She did not have to think too far to know that it seems Sai Man did what he did, but that he did not want to kill her. It was as if Sai Man was putting up an act for someone. She was supposed to die. But Sai Man, in a way, saved her. Who could have wanted her dead? Who could have been so powerful to have Sai Man do what they want? Still, Sik Sik was hurt that Sai Man never shared with her his troubles. He did not give her a choice. Instead, he took it upon himself to decide and seal her fate. It was just once too often.
Sik Sik promised herself she would not cry, if and when, she saw Sai Man again. She promised herself. She willed it. She was almost successful, but somehow, when he uttered the first words, she could not hold back the tears. She did not want Sai Man to see her crying. She wanted to be strong. She wanted him to know that he could not have the effect on her anymore. The only way that Sai Man would not see her cry was to run away.
Sai Man chased after Sik Sik into the house. But the door to the only bedroom was shut closed. There was silence inside. “Sik Sik, open up please,” said Sai Man as he knocked on the door. “It is all over now. I would like to explain. I love you. I would like to take you home now. I want to take you to the Imperial Palace where we will be together forever. Sik Sik, please open the door.”
There was still silence inside. He could hear what he thought were little muffled cries and some clothes rustling gently, but nothing else. If only she would say something, anything to him, he thought. He would prefer her to scold him, tell him what she thought than the silent treatment. It hurt him as much as seeing her tears flow because of something he did.
“Sik Sik. I beg you to open up and listen to me,” pleaded Sai Man, this time knocking more insistently on the door.
Still nothing.
“Sik Sik, you could not understand the dilemma I was in. I was torn between my love for you and my obligation to the country and my people,” said Sai Man. He rested his hands on the door, talking with her through a closed door. He did not want to explain to Sik Sik this way, but he could not expect her to welcome him with open arms after what he had done. It was unforgivable. Nevertheless, he hoped Sik Sik would see it in her heart to forgive him.
So Sai Man explained to Sik Sik that his uncle, Tau Kwok Kau, gave the ultimatum and how Li Jing and he, with the assistance of his two closet advisors, planned to deceive Tau Kwok Kau. He explained the power Tau Kwok Kau had with his royal father, the Emperor. He explained the impending pressures from Li Wai Gut and Li King Sing. Li Jing laid out the plan that Sai Man had to convincingly stab Sik Sik with the knife, showing him where to position the knife so that it will not impale any vital internal organs, and how Sai Man was to seal the pressure points until Yat Tang Dai Si could save her before she fell to the rocks below. It was orchestrated very carefully, very painfully so, because the deception had to look real. Tau Kwok Kau’s men were everywhere and Sai Man knew that he was trailed that day. He also knew if Tau Kwok Kau did not have some physical evidence of the deed, he would not be convinced. Sai Man had difficulty explaining to Sik Sik what he eventually had to do on the cliff that day. It pained him to think about it. But he had an act to play for Tau Kwok Kau’s man or else all would be lost.
“There was never a promise that our plan would work Sik Sik. There was no guarantee that our plan would work and that Yat Tang Dai Si would be able to save you, but I had no choice. Yat Tang Dai Si was consulted and he said there were no guarantees, but that no one had perished under his care,” continued Sai Man.
“I have never been afraid before in my life. But Sik Sik, when I hurt you and saw you plummet off the cliff, I was terribly afraid. I wanted to jump and follow you. It took all my strength to hold my ground and wish Tien Ti was looking down upon us and blessing us. It took all my composure to go through those initial days before we heard news from Yat Tang Dai Si that you were in his care and all right.”
“Sik Sik, forgive me please. I am so sorry. I love you and need you.”
The door abruptly opened from the inside. Sik Sik moved away from the door to stand near the window, looking out. Sai Man was so happy and relieved Sik Sik had opened the door finally. He took a couple of small steps into the room, but stopped short of Sik Sik and waited. He looked at her and could tell her eyes were red and a little puffy, but the tears seemed to have been wiped away. His heart somehow felt a pressure he seldom felt. It hurt him to know she was crying.
It seemed an eternity before Sik Sik spoke.
“Why couldn’t you have shared with me your predicament? Why didn’t you let me make a decision for myself? I do not interfere with your royal affairs, but I hope you will consider me important to share in your life, not just through the happy times, but through the difficult times too. I am not angry with you. I could never be. But I am sad,” whispered Sik Sik in a quivering voice, trying to speak and yet hold back her tears.
Sai Man listened intently before he responded. “I know I could not ask you to forgive me for all that have happened, but I could not tell you of this decision I had to make Sik Sik. My initial decision was to take you away with me. We would leave the Capitol and live a quiet life in a remote bucolic village far away somewhere. But I could not. I could not be selfish for my own happiness and leave the country to my two brothers. The people would suffer. I could not tell you because I thought it would hurt you more than to do it this way. This way I could be the one to make the difficult decision, live with the consequence, but not put you in the same predicament. It was not much of a choice.”
“I am afraid Sai Man. Whether you meant to before, you turned me away once and next, you deceived me in hopes I would run to Kong Fung. Then this. I am frightened of the future. I do not know if I could handle it again if you decide to cast me away for some reason. I am wholly confident of your love, but I would hope to be by your side to make decisions on my life, on our life together, not to be invisible and then told to deal with what life dealt to me. It is a lonely feeling, Sai Man. Do you understand what I mean?”
Sai Man came close to Sik Sik. He was right behind her. She could feel his warmth. He brushed up against her. He could smell the natural sweet earthiness that always reminded him of her. Sai Man gently caressed her hand on the windowsill with his right forefinger. Sik Sik missed Sai Man’s arms around her. It took all her will power not to lean back into his body.
Sai Man could feel Sik Sik stiffening, but he would not back away. “Sik Sik, I made decisions in my life which I wish I did not have to make. In fact, I do not wish my worst enemy should ever have to make the decisions I had to make. I am not proud of some of the things I had to do, but I do not regret them. You are dearest to my heart, and those who want to hurt me will go after you first. But I am the Crown Prince now; there will be no one else who can separate us. I am so sorry for what I have put you through. When it comes to love, I have made a few mistakes in turning you away, but I promise I will try harder next time. We can grow together. I will be a better person for you, a good husband to you.”
“Kong Fung once told me,” continued Sai Man, “’never hurt the one you love because it will be too late to regret it someday.’ I took his advice to heart and promised him I will never leave you.”
“Sai Man . . . .”
“Sik Sik, come with me,” Sai Man whispered persuasively near Sik Sik’s ears. His lips brushed her ear lobe. Still standing behind her, he wrapped his arms around her, and because she was so petite, was able to envelop her into his arms and caress her arms with his fingers simultaneously. He could sense Sik Sik’s defense weakening. He kissed her on the crown of her head.
And Sai Man got his answer. Sik Sik relaxed in Sai Man’s arms and rested her head on his chest.
CHAPTER 6
To help Sik Sik get acclimated to the Capitol again, Sai Man brought Sik Sik to the Li Mansion first. He would choose a good day to escort Sik Sik to the Imperial Palace. He already had her quarters ready at the palace, but yet to tell the Emperor. He wanted her to be his Princess before he would become King and she his Queen.
Sai Man arranged to talk privately with Kong Fung before he re-introduced Sik Sik. This was the first time they were together after the confrontation with Li Wai Gut and Li King Sing Sing within the Capitol walls. As they drank privately in a room, they talked about the triumphs and tribulations of the past few months. Kong Fung began to unconsciously think about the loss of Wu Tien Mun, his school mates and friends. He thought of what Li Wai Gut said moments before his death and wanted to ask Li Tai Gor. Kong Fung also pictured Sik Sik in his mind. Sik Sik was so beautiful. He wished he never left their village in search of martial arts. She would still be alive. If only . . . .
Kong Fung’s thoughts broke off as he thought he heard Sai Man mention Sik Sik. He thought he heard Li Tai Gor apologize about something, than he realized that Li Tai Gor did in fact say Sik Sik was alive.
“Sik Sik?” questioned Kong Fung. He was in shock! “Sik Sik is not dead?” he continued with both a surprised and puzzled expression and tone. Kong Fung’s heart was beating fast and he was so happy to hear the news. Then he listened further as Li Tai Gor explained the deception they set-up painstakingly for Tau Kwok Kau and how he could not tell Kong Fung or anyone else. It needed to look real and what better to show that it was real unless there were people mourning after a loss. They anticipated some of the reactions and that contributed to the success of the plan. Li Tai Gor apologized again to Kong Fung for putting him through the grief.
“May I see Sik Sik? I would like to see Sik Sik for myself,” said Kong Fung. He was ecstatic with the news of Sik Sik. So relieved she was alive. He did not mention or ask any questions of Li Tai Gor about the deception . . . nevertheless, he could not help wonder about what Li Wai Gut said. What else had Li Tai Gor done? What was Li Tai Gor capable of doing to win the throne?
“Of course, Kong Fung,” replied Sai Man. “Sik Sik is resting now, but tonight, we would like to invite you to stay for dinner tonight. It will be served shortly. Lok Wan is here too.”
“Lok Wan? Did she know about Sik Sik?” questioned Kong Fung.
“No, Lok Wan, was not in on the plan. She is innocent. I wanted to tell you first and then I will tell Lok Wan later,” replied Sai Man.
Later that night, Li Jing and Madame Li prepared a quiet and quaint dinner. They were all sitting at the table when Sai Man entered the room, Sik Sik by his side. He escorted Sik Sik to the table. Kong Fung had stood up when Sik Sik entered and came to her side to inquire about her. He came to pay her his greetings, was reserved, but inside, he was so happy she was alive. He wanted to talk to her, but it was a little difficult with Li Tai Gor present. And to compound it, Lok Wan rushed to Sik Sik’s side in her relief and ecstasy, and stayed all night beside Sik Sik.
Later than evening, when dinner was over, they gathered in the sitting room to have some tea. They talked a little more. As Sik Sik bade everyone a good night because she wanted to rest, Kong Fung excused himself and asked to escort her back to her room. Neither Sai Man nor Lok Wan made a comment.
Kong Fung and Sik Sik walked in silence until Kong Fung asked whether Sik Sik was happy.
“Yes, I am very happy,” replied Sik Sik. “Happiness is what I make of it after all. If you are asking about whether I am happy with the turn of events, there is nothing I can do. I have come to understand and accept there are times when you do things you do not want to do. Even you have gone through it Kong Fung. I do not blame anyone. I am not mad at anyone. It is my fate. And it is up to me to think and make my destiny as good as can be.”
“Yes, and I have regretted it,” Kong Fung replied resignedly. He knew what she meant. Even though Sik Sik did not blame him, he always regretted that he gave up Sik Sik for martial arts. He wished he never left their village in search of martial arts. If only . . . .
“We should look forward to the future. I love Sai Man and cannot live without him. But Kong Fung, you are my best friend. I hope you think of me as one and that you will always remain my best friend.” With that comment, they had arrived at Sik Sik’s room. They bade each other a good night. Sik Sik closed the door as Kong Fung turned around and walked away.
Kong Fung walked along the corridor to one of the small gardens. He was thinking about what Sik Sik said. It seemed a lifetime since he left his village for town. Since coming to Wu Tien Mun, befriending Li Tai Gor, all the experiences since, his life changed so much. He still loved Sik Sik very much, and had come to accept that as long as she was alive and happy, he would be content with that part of his life. He saw in her eyes her affection for Li Tai Gor. Kong Fung could never win back her love and yet, could not love another as Sik Sik.
CHAPTER 7
A few days later, Li Sai Man escorted Sik Sik to the Imperial Palace. He took Sik Sik to her private quarters and was extra careful in ensuring she was comfortable. Her private quarters were not ostentatious, just comfortable and with amenities that he thought Sik Sik would be familiar with so she would not be in shock living in a new place. After all, after the wedding ceremony, she would be staying with him at his quarters. Vases of white lilies mixed with pink peonies were splayed artistically around the several rooms. He even had peony perfume oil handcrafted and delivered from Li Jing’s hometown at her disposal in the boudoir. However, what captured Sik Sik’s heart and attention most was what she found on her pillow. It was the operatic mask Sai Man used to cheer her up in one of their initial encounters. Sai Man brought the operatic mask from the Li Mansion. She pictured the scene fondly as it flashed through her mind. The mask brought them together because it was one of Sai Man’s attempts to make her happy when she was feeling so desolate. She had not seen it since she was gone last time. Sai Man knew how sentimental the mask meant for Sik Sik and he made sure it was brought to the Capitol. He wanted her happy. Sik Sik was touched with Sai Man’s thoughtfulness.
He introduced Sik Sik to Chan Poh Poh, his nanny who had taken care of him since he was a baby. He left Sik Sik with Chan Poh Poh, who he trusted with his life, otherwise he would not leave Sik Sik alone so soon. He had matters to take care of before the coronation. He went to see his royal father and broke the news of Sik Sik to him. Sai Man asked the Emperor to allow him to marry Sik Sik. The Emperor asked Sai Man about Sik Sik’s background and lineage.
Up until the past few months, the Emperor would mostly likely have dismissed Sai Man’s request without much thought. The Emperor was not a very good Emperor as he enjoyed the pleasures of his position more than the obligations. He would have been patronizing and condescending to issues that affected the royal status. Chun Sik Sik came from a humble background. How could she be a match for a royal Prince? However, with the passing of his two sons and the retirement of Tau Kwok Kau, he was ready to pass on the throne to his only remaining son. He had given thought to the fact that his inept reign may have enabled the dissention and bloodshed in the court. Sai Man was always his preferred choice as the Crown Prince . . . until that unfortunate incident in which Sai Man was connected to the death of one of his favorite concubines. Sai Man was intelligent, observant, and generous. Above all, the Emperor knew Sai Man loved his people and will take his duties seriously.
He gave his blessings to Sai Man for the royal wedding, with a date for the coronation to follow soon there after.
Sik Sik never looked lovelier in her red wedding dress and regal wedding headdress. She was absolutely stunning. Sai Man beamed as he saw Sik Sik. It was a dream come true for him. He fought so hard for their love. He was finally able to proclaim Sik Sik as his beloved to the entire country. As the Emperor blessed the wedding, the people throughout the country were celebrating to mark the happy day of their beloved Crown Prince.
The coronation took place the following weekend. Li Sai Man was proclaimed Emperor in front of the Mandarins and Ministers in the Imperial Court. They all pledged loyalty and long life to their new Emperor and Empress. The young couple looked regal and beautiful together. The two marked the beginning of a new era. Out on the streets of the Capitol, people were remarking that the new Emperor and Empress made an undeniably excellent couple together. The young Emperor was so intelligent and talented, while the young Empress was graceful, virtuous and beautiful. The people also remarked a new day has begun. They predicted a peaceful and abundant reign. Sai Man and Sik Sik epitomized a dream come true.
Later than night, when Sai Man and Sik Sik were alone in their private quarters, Sai Man told Sik Sik he had a little present for her. Sik Sik flushed pink and coyly responded, “You have given me so many presents already, what more could I possibly want or need?”
“And I will continue to lavish you with more presents, more jewelry, and more clothes! I like to give you things. I love you! If you like anything, it is yours!” proclaimed Sai Man excitedly and playfully. Sai Man was in a euphoric state, he was so happy to have Sik Sik’s love and share his future with her. “Actually, this little gift I have for you is not really a gift from me. Here it is.”
Sik Sik looked up at Sai Man and saw his rakish smile. Her heart skipped a beat just looking at him.
Sai Man had whipped out a little box that he held behind his back. It was a beautiful cloisonné box with gold trimmings. It was decorated with two beautiful butterflies. In the corner of the box were embedded sparkling precious gems. The cloisonné was made with perfection and Sik Sik knew Sai Man must have gotten it especially for her from the famous cloisonné-maker in a town near the Capitol.
“Open it up and take a look Sik Sik.”
Sik Sik unclasped the box and to her utter surprise, she saw the handkerchief she had embroidered the fateful night before her fall. The dragon and the phoenix signified her and Sai Man together forever. She had made it for Sai Man. She had not thought of that piece since.
“I have had it with me, near my heart, Sik Sik. It never left me. Now that you are home, I want you to have it back,” said Sai Man.
Sik Sik was overjoyed at hearing Sai Man say these words. He never knew she had made it for him. She did not tell him.
“I do not know what to say,” began Sik Sik. She was so touched by his sentimentality and love.
“I made this for you. I never told you because I wanted it to be a surprise for you. I was thinking of us when I made this handkerchief. It seems you kept it as it was intended. Please keep it. Sai Man, I love you so,” Sik Sik shyly professed.
Sai Man took Sik Sik into his arms and led her to the bedroom. It was a night long in the waiting.
